When the time comes, when the caterpillar breaks free from the cocoon… did I really know what to expect…
For 20 years she’s been in the cocoon… growing, nurtured, confined, and sustained …and in the last six months the cocoon has seen movement… stretching, struggling, writhing with new life breaking through.
and the cocoon is now broken and she sits on the outside beating her wings, filling them with fluid in preparation to rise to the skies and fly…
AND I AM SO PROUD – she is making ready to fly on her own adventure…
This “cocoon” is seriously splitting with joy but it is split none the less. And splitting is always painful; it hurts to be torn asunder. My heart aches in a strange way that I’ve never felt before. A combination of pride, happiness, grief, jealousy, and fear all tangled into this happy mess of joining two families.
While we’ve been preparing her for this moment since she was born I didn’t think to prepare myself and I’ve caught my foot and I’m stumbling trying to recover my gait and not fumble the baton. And the issue is trust… once again having to place her in God’s hands and allow Him to do His work. Knowing that He can still meet her needs and that her world will keep spinning without me holding her tightly.
A runner knows that the baton they carry isn’t meant to be kept but passed into the care of other runners… we press on for the goal together for the high calling… and the runner carries the baton but the goal has been set by the Maker a long time ago and the baton He placed in our hands at the beginning of the race belongs to Him and is being carried for His purpose toward the finish line that He has marked.
So I stop, panting and breathing hard… sweat and tears running down my face and I’m squinting into the distance reminding myself that this isn’t about the baton but about “THE GOAL.” Batons were meant to be passed and with great effort I will my hand to loosen the grip and get ready for the pass to the runner waiting ahead of me and recognize that by God’s grace he will run as well as – if not better than – I toward the same goal.
We run to take VICTORY…and we can rejoice together that even if one stumbles on their way the point is that they are on THE WAY.
And I run toward the goal to take the victory of the calling of God from on high in Yeshua The Messiah. Philippians 3:14
Though a righteous man falls seven times, he will get up… Proverbs 24:16